Thank God I am safe!

Another tragic and heart breaking rape story in the newspaper... to add to Meera’s traumatic situation was the fact that the incident happened at a place just few meters away from her home. She was upset and scared, she was trembling in fear imagining how Snaya (name changed obviously) might have been trapped... how she might have screamed for help... how she might have tried hitting them hard using all her energy and strength.... how she might have used the best technique from her self-defense classes but all went in vain and all she might have done was to cry for some mercy, to leave her and not ruin her life... not destroy her mind, body & soul...

It was a busy hour - 6 in the evening... Seriously no one heard her screams? or the story was entirely different? I mean.... did people ignore her screams because 'it’s none of their business'? Were they waiting for that 'interesting stuff' to go through in the newspapers or media channels the next day... 


Crushing the newspaper and coming out of her imagination, she shouted loudly... 'Oh yeah! Why would they try to save her and risk their lives when they are ready with the candles and some banners for a march next day because those ba*****s might kill that girl after such a heinous crime... why would they move even an inch…'

Or may be no one even heard it… may be her screams were echoing within her only… did those monsters shut her mouth or they made her go unconscious…. Did they hit her that hard?




Her eyes were red with rage, anger, helplessness, shame… tears rolled down her cheeks making the paper wet. Her mom and dad tried to calm her down but of no use at the moment. Meera decided to move out for her office routine despite of her family insisting her to take a day off.


Just like every day, she rolled the newspaper and put inside her huge beige and green polka dot hand bag. She enjoys reading the newspaper in her free time, she takes that out to stay updated of the politics, sports and other news.


But today, the day was not just like any other day… she was upset, she was in shock and she was frightened to read such news one after the other… sometimes on the front page and sometimes on some of the inner page. 


She skipped her breakfast and moved towards the bus stop to board the respective bus for her journey to the office.


Despite of the chaotic crowd, honking vehicles and people racing here and there, Meera stood there unaffected staring at one point on the road. Thoughts rambling her mind making her feel as if she has no energy to begin her day with.




She had been so cold and numb that she could not even notice the arrival of the respective bus. Ria, her colleague and best friend noticed this and pushed Meera inside the bus. Thank god she did…

Somehow they both managed to get the seats in that crowded bus. Meera was still cold as ice whilst Ria was staring at her badly.


“What’s the matter Meera?”


Not getting the response from her made Ria pop the question again: “Meera, what happened to you? Are you okay?”


Ria again felt herself unattended so this time, she shook her "Meera? Meera? Are you okay? What happened to you? Why are so mute and cold? Is everything alright at home?

You can share with me... Tell me what happened?"

She was upset… she didn't speak up a word but passed on the newspaper to Ria with that news open. Ria began reading the news headline when the bus crossed that particular area and Meera noticed police vans, ambulance, some dogs and officials. Seeing this was horrible... She was so frightened that she held Ria's hand tightly leaving reddish impressions clearly on her hand... By the time they crossed that area, Ria was shocked too and was sweating.


Ria’s ice cold hands and running eyes brought Meera back to her senses. She could feel that Ria needs her right now more than she needs Ria. 

Meera gazed at her with teary eyes and hugged her tight. The girls were behaving unusual and it made fellow passengers uncomfortable. Somehow they controlled themselves and luckily next stop was theirs. They quietly stepped out of the bus. 
Both were now slightly active and attentive – better than before. While walking from the bus stop to their office building, they kept on keeping mum. 


Meera, slightly turning towards Ria, asked her calmly; "What's bothering you now Ria?". I saw you trembling in fear. That was something different than the feeling of sympathy with that girl, the feeling of disgust towards those cowards and criminals... I felt it was not only that. 


Ria again had tears in her eyes. Now she didn't speak anything but scrolled her phone's screen and showed her the call log...


Mum   Yesterday  5:55 pm


"What's with it?? I am afraid now. For god sake, please tell me in detail" Meera stopped her and asked. 


"At 5:55 pm. I was crossing from that area only when mom called me. I am thankful to her that she called and fought with me to finish off the long pending chores. I am thankful that I changed my route. Thank god I am safe..."


Helpless Meera, trying to control her tears and console her, engulfed Ria in her arms, kissed her forehead and thanked God that she is safe. 


"I wish that girl could also say the same thing" - murmured Meera wiping her eyes. 


The day was long and tough. Both returned home together as no one was ready be alone and travel at different times. 




That night, Meera had several questions, several thoughts rambling her mind which she could express only and only in her diary:


"Thank God I am safe... Everyday when I leave home, my parents are worried until I reach home safely... 

'Oh God please keep every daughter safe. Don't let any monster crush her dreams to death.'
Everyday I reach home, I thank god that this day was safe for me. The trust I showed on my boss was not wrong, that auto wala bhaiya was also not wrong, the peon, that stranger, society's security guards, my friends, that vendor in the coffee shop, the cab driver.... Thank god I did not encounter any bad human today. Thank god I am safe today as well.  

Despite the fact that our parents try their level best to ensure a protected life, yet our life greatly revolves around this 'Thank God I am safe'...


Thank God I am safe... I wish she was safe too... I wish I could help her out in any way...

I wish I could control this... I wish....

Yes not all men are wrong or inhuman but yes for some inhuman people, we have to live in fear. Fear of losing ourselves, fear of suffering emotionally, mentally, physically for no strong reason... fear of death...."



... some things have no end!

Book Review: Love Struck by Prasupta Roy


Book Review by: Rupali Goyal

Title: Love Struck

Author: Prasupta Roy

Genre: Fiction

Publisher: HALF BAKED BEANS (11 May 2018)
Language: English

I read the Kindle Edition


Plot:



The story revolves around Katyaani, her husband Hemant and Siddharth – a tall and handsome hunk in his mid thirties with whom Katyaani falls in love.

Katyaani, the protagonist, works as a teacher and wants to excel in this field. But fate had some different plans. Her life changed completely when she got married to Hemant – a career oriented person. He was more keen to attain a certain level of social stature – a well settled, successful human being with a happy family. But, as they were unable to conceive a baby, the problems increased in their relationship. Considering that Katyaani is barren, Hemant felt disconnected with her… moving away from her. He no longer cares for her, her wishes, her desires, her emotions… nothing.


This is the point when broken Katyaani meets Siddarth – perfectly ‘most wanted’ man in Katyaani’s life. He meets all of her expectations – emotionally supports her… he feels her. And falling for such a person who cares for her unlike Hemant was quite obvious. Situations gave them chances to spend some more time with each other and fall in love with each other even harder. 


But Katyaani don’t want to move out of the marriage just because she don’t want to hurt Hemant. Another twist comes in when Hemant switches his job and decides to move to Bangalore. Now Katyaani feels alone in a new city, craves for Siddahrth even more but destiny did not have any plans for their reunion even until Hemant decides to move out of their marriage and marry another girl. Apparently, both wanted the same thing – to find new love – but Katyaani tried hard to sow the seeds of love and affection again between them; failing to which, she accepted the way it was which Hemant could not and lead to their Divorce. He showed  the courage to call off the marriage. Here I felt Katyaani as a fool and weak. She fell in love but did not have the courage to do what she wants – emotional turmoil. Sadly, many women do that.


Katyaani moves to Chennai and focuses on her career while she yearns for Siddharth every day. 


Will they meet again? Will she marry again? Is Hemant happy in his new marriage? Did Siddharth marry? 


You might be having same questions in your mind and all the answers to your questions lie in the book. So, grab your copy now and find it out! 


What was most interesting:

  1. 1. The book cover: Main part of any book is it’s cover and if you see below, the cover is quite interesting and it speaks even louder than  the title does. 
  2.  
  3.  2. Minute details: Prasupta has mentioned minute details in the book which are enough to keep the reader engrossed. While you read it, you’ll be able to clearly visualize it. I love such detailing whenever I am reading. 
  4. 3. Guess game will be on: While the story progresses, your mind will keep guessing what can happen next. I was even guiding Katyaani – please do this and  that… ;) I was so engrossed! 
  5. 4. Simplicity: The characters are quite simple with good expressions. The language of  the book is also simple.

The weak points: 

The opinions may vary from person to person but here is what I felt:

  1. 1. While I was reading, I felt the repetition of few words and even some emotions. 
  2. 2. Some grammatical errors which the editing team also overlooked. 
  3. 3. Siddharth’s and Katyaani’s love story started on Facebook but how come she did not Google his name(knowing he has become a painter) or stalk him on Facebook when she found no information about him anywhere else. That is the point I would consider as a loophole here.

       Overall, it is a good read and totally recommended.

       My Ratings: 3.5/5


Being an EMPATH…

It was the final meeting at office where from a team of 10, only 2 employees were to be picked up for the certification, bonus and added benefits. After the hard work of around 15 days, we appeared for the tests. As a result, one of my colleagues and I cleared the exam and we were honored with those glittering badges, certificates and bonus cheques.
But, in all this, I was still stressed out… My best friend.

Yes, she could not clear it. I was sad with that fact. We worked hard equally but she could not clear it. The results made me elated as well as sad at the same time.

Logically, the simple funda is, the one who works better, wins. Then why is this behavior? Maybe because she is my best friend...??
While I was being honored, my eyes were on her… I wanted to be with her for that very time and talk to her… be a support to her. I could see how she held back her tears, how she was upset for herself but super excited for me. That’s what friendship is I believe. That whole day was spent not in excitement for my achievement but it was spent with a hollowness…. As if something was missing. 
 


Did you notice something?

Probably not.

Late last night, I was watching a web series, when the lead actor was narrating his story, about the sacrifices he makes everyday killing his own dreams and fulfilling his parents'. I could notice the tears and changing expressions on his face… I felt like holding his hands warmly between my hands making him believe “all will be well - I am with you!”

Opposite to this, the girl sitting next to him concluded the conversation with a piece of advice to choose wisely. By the time I saw her reaction, I was furious and cursing her… cursing for the emotional support she could not offer him. Provided I was there, I would have made him comfortable and confident that I understand him and won’t leave his side ever... I would have convinced him to chase his dreams. How could she just walk away with 'you have to choose wisely and must not crib always'.

These are just few of the incidents I have explained. I face these everyday because I feel so much every day.

People who are home sick, I try to talk to them as much as possible;

When someone breaks up certain important relations, I take this as a responsibility to counsel them and make them feel better;

Sad status updates, shouts for help, messy professional life, broken up relations, deceased relations, failures, poverty and what not.

Every single emotion… mind my words, every single emotion, we(the empaths) take up on our face. We are not Pankaj Udaas all the time but an empath can see what no one can see and sometimes not even the one who is suffering from it. Sad and funny but true!

Now, the question is what(who) exactly is an empath?


empath

/ˈɛmpaθ/

noun: empath; plural noun: empaths

(chiefly in science fiction) a person with the paranormal ability to perceive the mental or emotional state of another individual.

  • 1. People who are very receptive to the emotions of others are known as empaths.
  • 2. They are also very sensitive to noise, smell, and being around people.
  • 3. This means they are overwhelmed in crowds, and get exhausted in social situations.

Now, the next questions are ‘Is it harmful or normal? What are their traits?’


  1. 1. We know it all – even if you don’t tell us.
  2. 2. We love alone time more than anything. No, we are not depressed or sad or emotionally dying. We just need some time alone.
  3. 3. We prefer sleeping alone :P
  4.  4. Crowded places make us feel overwhelmed.
  5. 5. We feel the pain and emotions of others as ours.
  6. 6. If you are not being honest, we know it pretty well. Or if your mind and words are not coordinated well – you are trying to hide your true emotions, we know it.
  7. 7. These ones are worst. I tell  you… Digestive problems, constant fatigue, lower back pain problems and the natural tendency to adapt the physical pain of others.
  8. 8. Addictive and creative personality
  9. 9. People love sharing things with us… they seek us as confidants. Especially when they are in problem and need emotional support. We are great helpers – that inner desire to help others let us do anything required to help them. Going our way out is the normal thing for us.
  10. 10. We can’t do the things we don’t enjoy and also get bored easily… Distracted – if I missed that one!
  11.  11. Curiously looking for answers & knowledge.
  12.  12. Great listener
  13.  13. Prone to gain weight even they control their diet.
  14. 14. We are natural healers(we can be great counselors) but at times, we start drifting away from healing as we don’t usually get the emotional support like we give.
  15.  15. Highly moody, shy and might appear disconnected at times. Worst is that we can often sense, feel and even take on the energy or mood of the people around us. Hence, we tend to drift apart from some negative elements – especially on days you move out highly energetic. You can find me disconnected here.
  16.  16. Haters of narcissism.
Just see man, how tough is our life!!

Ok jokes apart. It becomes really tough to handle the things at times. When you could have reacted calmly and casually, you react with full emotions and rage leading to a weird sense of uselessness and self-pity… Those negative emotions are difficult to tackle at times.

But all in all, I am happy that people are talking more about this 'category' of people and knowing such people in depth. May be those can help out many other people around them.

Key takeaway: Mood and energy management is something every empathy should learn. I am learning too.


I hope you have a great time ahead and enjoy your life fully.

XoXo




I also love the 'SHE' in him...


I love him,
love him alot...
For the 'HE' in him -
his well-built physique,
strong shoulders,
stable mind,
hunger for success,
his passion, 
his discipline...
I love him!

I also love him
for the 'SHE' in him -
the SHE who
cries upon missing his mom,
I like his softer side - sometimes tagged as SHE like qualities

the SHE who jumps out of excitement
seeing the surprises I plan...
I like it when he says 'awwww' for my efforts
and shows me the love I deserve

I love the SHE
who gently holds me around my waist
instead of pulling my whole body with that 'manly' force

I love the SHE
who cooks food for me often

I love the SHE
who often has disruptive mood swings
and seek my support

I love the SHE in him
who becomes the best buddy(babe) in
gossips

I love the SHE
who holds my bags while I shop
and wears that pink shirt just like
his black shirt
because pink is not only liked by women

Yes, I love him... 

Apart from loving the HE in him
I also love the SHE in him

The Choices that went wrong

One of my good friends recently taught me a thing about which I am a bit doubtful and curious to know your thoughts:

He said: "we give people the choices"


Is that so?

Somewhat, somewhere I believe he is right... we give choices to people...
the choice to behave with us, to care for us, to love us...
But... but was it I who gave many people a choice to leave me,
not to love me,
forget me like a bad dream,
to tell me lies every other time...?

Why is that, people pick the choices we never give them?
I wanted each one of them to stay, stay till the end;
to tell me the truth every time they should or don't tell me anything at all...

Where did you get the choice to lie from?
Why couldn't you stay?
Why they couldn't keep the promises?
Why was I not enough to make a difference in their lives when what all I did was to take care of their choices, times, dreams and needs??

I believe the choice I gave them - to love me, to be with me, to stay loyal to me... to be friends with me, were so difficult to pick an easy option - to tell a lie and leave!
Right, I gave them the choices...

Have I not suffocated them with my love and care,
Have I not heard them whenever they required,
Have I not been with them whenever I could,
Have I not spoiled them with treats and gifts,
Have I not understood their moods,
they would have stayed.
would have definitely stayed for longer...

~ Rupali Goyal
#TheWordBrewer
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